Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Bowden out, LaCava in?

With all the bad news surfacing lately, specifically the Frowney news combined with the skimming investigation, Jim Bowden's seat has been a little warm lately. Whatever my feelings for the man, and the job he's done may be, I can't say this wouldn't be a welcome change.
According to more than one source, the decision may have already been made. Jimbo is out as Nats GM, and Tony Lacava (current Asst. GM in Toronto) is in. The only thing that has kept it from being made official is the whole making it official thingie. (Which, let's face it, is pretty damn important.)
So, until there's more concrete proof available that it is happening, I'll leave you with the only thing I'm good at decent at capable of. A picture of one of my cats. Murdering Jim Bowden. Enjoy.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Passionate duel to take place at Nats Park in July

July 11th is the date. Nationals Park is the place. For what? Well...for the jamminest piano jamming this side of...Heaven!
Elton John and Billy Joel, two of the most popular performers in pop history, are returning to Washington, D.C. In what will be the first concert in Nationals Park history, the dynamic piano-playing duo will perform on July 11 at 7:30 p.m. ET.
Sweeeet! I love me some knighted Englishmen and singers who marry chicks 32 years younger than themselves. (Although, to be honest, the fact that Joel chose swallowing furniture polish as his way to go out was pretty damn cool. Even if it didn't work.)
I'm sorry to say I won't be attending this (sure to be) fantastic (epic, even?) show. I like my trips to Nats Park to showcase less....Elton John. Oh, and less piano. This partnership even confounds the un-confoundable DOOKS!

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Ovie? Speachless.

If you didn't watch the game last night, like myself, witness the greatness that is The Russian Superman. I wish I had something witty to say, but I'm just sitting here grinning.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

MLB's merchandise shop shuns the Nationals.

So, I'm kinda bummed out over the whole "Smiley" debacle (It turns out Smiley isn't his real name. It's actually Julio Franco.), when I come across an email from MLB.com.
St. Patrick's Day gear & Free Domestic Ground Shipping!
"Shit damn", I says, "Different, new Nats gear. And it'll be green." My mom was born in Dublin*, so I was also gonna look into buying her a Christmas present in February. (Who am I kidding...not "a" present. Her only present. I love you, Ma!) Plus, free domestic ground shipping!

So, I click the link, and all I see is Red Sox, Yankees, Cubs and Mets stuff...the fucks the Nats stuff? Then..I look harder at the page. (Might need to click to enlarge.)

I hate you, Bud Selig. You go to hell. You go to hell and you die!

*One Christmas I went home and the place was all decorated with "Irish Christmas" thingies, like...green snowflakes, and snow covered shamrocks. The pride and joy to my mom, however, was the two foot tall "Santa Claus" statue. Only it didn't look like Santa. He was dressed in mostly white and green, and had shamrocks all over him. I asked my mom what the thing was, and my mom said, "Oh, that's an Irish Santa."My brother peeps up with, "So, what's that mean? Irish Santa? What...he's drunk?"

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

What Jesus wants, Jesus gets.

While reading Chico Harlan's column about Jesus Flores, I came across this gem.
[Jesus] retold the story this week of his offseason request for new batting gloves. He wanted Nike to customize a model marked with his No. 3 and "J-Flo." The company responded that they did so only for all-stars, Flores said.

Screw you, Nike! Nobody puts Jesus in a corner. So, I took it upon myself to take care of my boy. Based upon this picture I stole came across on the internet (source here) below...

...I found Jesus' batting glove over at the Nike site, and designed one that I think fits him quite nicely. Behold...The Jesus Batting Glove of DOOOOOM!

Also reported...
Matt Chico threw in the bullpen this morning, just a light 30-pitch workout.

If that doesn't give you a nice tingling in your loins, you're dead to me. Long live our left coast lefty!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Hey, let's just screw with what worked.

You know that year that Nick Johnson proved he was for reals? 2006, it was. He did little things like..finish 4th in the league in OBP (.428), 10th in OPS (.948), 7th in doubles (46), 6th in adjusted OPS+ (149), 9th in times on base (268), 6th in Offensive Win % (.718), and 7th in intentional walks (15). He also hit .290 with .526 Slg with 23 HRs, blah blah blah.

Well, it turns out that the entire year, Nick was swinging like a moron. He's lucky he made any contact at all!

It turns out that newly hired hitting coach for the Nationals, Rick Eckstein, locked himself in his basement and watched videos of Nick swinging. He had some ideas about Nick's swing, and brought him over to his house. They watched the videos, had a discussions, then decided,
They want Johnson to master a new swing."I've been doing it wrong my whole life," Johnson said Saturday.

My God, man. Imagine if he could swing like a competent two-handed two-footed human being!

I was all for letting Lenny Harris (the old hitting coach) go after last years futile plate performance by the Nats. A change couldn't hurt, after all. But (deep breath) ...let me see if I get this right...you want to have Nick The Stick change his swing? Something he hasn't done since High School? Really? Like, really really?

If this ends poorly, Eckstein becomes my new Ray King. I will be obsessed with making his life miserable, and will be purchasing a rocket launcher from some post USSR stock pile to write his name on yelling at him about how rotten he is. While shaking my finger at him quite aggressively.

Speaking of post USSR...Alexander Ovechkin (Russian Superman to you and me) scored another hat trick last night. Ho-hum. Whoop-dee-do. This guys becoming more predictable than the Mets choking in September. I did have a chance to catch up with him after the game last night (flights to Florida are cheap these days, folks), and I asked him how he was feeling.

As you can see, the man is very quiet (might need to click the picture to hear his quote), yet very deadly. This Feb 22 Penguins game is looking like so much fun, right Puttzy?

Thursday, February 12, 2009

The most pressing question with the Adam Dunn signing.

The one question on everyone's mind right now is what to do about Adam Dunn. And his number. The Big Donkey wore #44 for nine years in Cincinnati. (Thank God for spell check, btw. Why the hell can I never spell Cincinnati right? I always wanna throw in a few extra "t"s. Cincinatti kinda looks right. Right?) After he was traded to the Arizona Diamondbacks last year, Adam wore #32 because two year starter Micah Owings was wearing #44.
Now...I'm not one to judge, or jump to conclusions...but, if Adam can't get Micah, shown below, to give up his number...

Imagine what Blastings will say when Adam approaches him for #44...

On the other hand, I am friends with a friend of a friend of Lasting's cousin, and I heard he does have a price, and the number could be had if the price is right...

FWIW, no one on the current 40 man roster is sporting #32, so maybe the Dunner will just settle for that?

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

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JimBo Done a Dunn Deal. Nationals sign Adam Dunn!

It was either that or Dunn a Done Deal. They both suck, but who cares, right? We got Adam Troy Dunn. 6'6" of pure twisted steel and dynamite. Saints be praised!
My man Chico got the scoop. Props to him, as some had been hating on him for getting beat by other writers to stories. Bill Ladson was probably breaking a Kit-Kat while Chico was breaking this deal. Just kidding, Bill. Love you!

The Washington Nationals have agreed to a preliminary deal with free agent Adam Dunn, a signing that would fulfill their offseason-long search for a left-handed power hitter. Two independent sources have told the Post that Dunn will sign a two-year deal, possibly announced as early as tomorrow.

No word on the dollar amount yet, but I'll have to assume it falls between the $5MM (+ incentives) that Abreu signed, and the $14MM Dunn was asking for. Plus, there's that whole "Come play for the Washington Nationals" fee we had to pay. My guess? 2 years $24MM. Plus free Ben's Chili Bowl, or Red Hot and Blue... whatever the big man wants.
Update: Chico's saying it's two years $20MM. Seriously? We just signed Adam Dunn for the cost of Milton Bradley? JimBo, you scally-wag you!

So, who's the odd man out? I wrote back in early January that it appeared to me the Nats were trying to squeeze Milledge outta town. If Dunn DOES play LF, then I'm assuming it's DOOKS! in CF, and Willingham/Kearns in right. This kinda depends on Nick Johnson being healthy all spring, which is kinda like hoping Ray King could shop anywhere besides a big and tall store. (He may be gone, and thank Jesus for that, but I'll always hate that man.)
Or...say Nick the Stick does have a great spring. His trade value would be high, and since he's more fragile than Barbaro, it would be the best time of the whole year to trade him. Get some nice prospects outta the deal, and we cool. He is making $5.5MM this year, and no way that gets sat on the bench. (Which brings about another argument about Kearnsie, which I choose not to get into now.) Oakland was rumored to be interested in him, and a good spring could push the deal.

This is really getting me pumped for Spring Training. Well, this and Mother Nature getting drunk lately, and handing over reign of the DC area weather to her 3 year old kid. For Christ's sake, lady..it's February! Is a little snow, and highs in the 30s too hard for you to understand? You trying to keep us on our toes with a few days in the 70s every now and then? Screw you. My sweater vests are in rotation now... and you shouldn't fuck with the rotation. Blastings would agree, I think.

So, folks. Strap yourselves in, cause this could be one hell of a ride. Dunn is bringing his career average's with him, and while some are good (.247/.381/.518; 29 2B; 40HR; 96RBI; 130OPS+) some might cause some bumps in the road (.247; 180 SO). But who the hell cares, I say! We just got us someone nicknamed the BIG frickin DONKEY!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Almost Time For Spring Training.

So, I told my kitty today that Spring Training starts next Saturday.

Correct, lil' glee filled cat of mine. No Ray King this year.