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Thursday, September 10, 2009

Jesus has returned to walk the earth.

It's not exactly the beginning of the fulfillment of the Messianic prophecy (I hope, at least. Cause I'm fucked if that does happen.), but it is a big development for the Nats.

Yes, Jesus "Barbaro" Flores made a pinch hit appearance in lasts night's game, but isn't expected to make any starts at catcher the rest of the year. He's welcomed back with open arms by me, to say the least. I just hope he's been drinking his milk while he's been gone, cause he's... well ... how can I put this... fragile as Kurt Cobain's emotions were in April of 1994. He only played in 26 games this year, before being sidelined by a foul ball to the shoulder. Last year, he played in just 90 games, due to Chase Utley smashing his ankle in early September.

It was great to see Jesus get an at-bat yesterday. I only wish he could've drawn a walk or hit a single. That way, he could try to steal second, and break both of Utley's legs, arms, lungs, eyes, ears, and kidneys (humans do have two of those, right? I hope so, cause if not, I'm screwed from that time I woke up in Mexico all groggy in a bathtub full of ice). God damn do I hate me some Chase Utley. That cheap shot taking mother fucker.

Oh, I saw Jesus before the game, and he showed me his new catching gear. I think it's nice, but I'm not sure how he's gonna be mobile enough to get to all of Mikey MacDougal's wild throws.


Welcome back, Jesus. Try not to break anything high-fiving in the dugout.

1 comment:

Joseph Alexander said...

apparently he didn't listen...torn labrum? Must've been some kinda high-five...