I'm trying to knock this post out before my boss sends me another email. We'll see how that goes.
My views from last night's not loss:
- I crushed a six-pack of Reese's peanut butter eggs in two innings. Them fuckers be delicious.
- Adam Dunn is so reliable, watches ask him for the time. (Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all the week. Tip your waitresses.)
- Shy Young could seriously do some damage if his three pitches can all be thrown for strikes. He can't bunt for shit, however.
- Zippie chance DOOKS! was taking on that 3-0 pitch. Before Dibble (Who I actually like!) and Carpy (Who I still hate!) had their green light conversation, I beat them to it. I'm in my living room, and I jump up and scream as loud as I can, in my best Bill Alfonso voice, "Green Light Daddy-O!" The man beast swung, and that shit was crushed.
- I think I'm gonna like Joe Beimel. Sure, he might look...um...different (is caveman-like too harsh to say?), but he just made the Phillies look silly in the 8th. The set-up job is his.
- If we just get some consistent pitching, we could be okay. Right now, we rank 5th in the NL with an average of 5.25 runs scored/game. We're dead last in runs allowed per game, however with 7. I'm telling you, this offense can score more times than Mickey Rooney had wives. (He was married 8 times. Seriously. Mickey fucking Rooney. This little guy.)
We got all boisterous and flipped over a
Uh-oh, just got an email from the dictator. I'll talk to you deliriously happy folks later.