Monday, May 18, 2009

The Ross Detwiler live blog

9:05 I lied. Here is what I better see when I wake up tomorrow... Mock, optioned to Syacuse. Clippard, promoted from Syracuse. Colome, optioned (or DfA'd if he has no options left). Bergmann, promoted from Syracuse. It's not fucking rocket science, right? RIGHT!?

8:55 Mock imploded (shocked?). The game is tied, and Colome is coming in. 1 man on 1 man out. I think I'll go sob in the corner. I'm done. The next time I address this will be a new post.

Rob Dibble quote after ball one thrown by Colome to the first batter on the first pitch, "Man, we have that down, don't we?" I love that man.

8:43 Zim just crushed a ball. I mean, flat out raked that shit. HR to dead center. 5-3 after 5.

8:41 and .5 seconds: Oh, wait. The bullpen would have to hold for four innings. HA! times infinity.

8:41 Hooray. Nick puts the Nats up by one with a 3 run homer. Mr. Detwiler is now the pitcher of record, and could get the win.

8:34 As I walk to get Yuengling #3 I hear Alex Cintron being introduced. FUCK FUCK FUCK. The kid threw 84 pitches. I can't believe Manny is going to the bullpen. I swear to Christ, sometimes I think he has a copy of "Manage by Numbers" in the dugout.
C'MON, Manny, you really want Mock in there instead of Det!!??

8:32 Wow. I need to rip into Josh more. Double off the wall. 3-1 bad guys with runner on second and 1 out.

8:31 Willie Harris on third with one out. Good chance to eat into the lead. WAIT, wait. Josh Bard is coming up. Mea culpa.

8:26 Det strikes out the first two batters of the fifth, then gets the third batter on one pitch. I'm telling you, this fucking kid is dealing. If Nick doesn't commit that error to put a runner at second, we could be looking at a 0-0 score (or 1-0 at most).

8:22 Forgot to mention that the Pierogies are here from Pittsburgh to partake in the President's race. Nationals Park, where magic happens!

8:20 I'll never get tired of hearing "Even Flow" when Willingham comes to the plate. I'll always thing twice when I hear Genesis (or maybe it's Phil Collins solo stuff?) playing when Dunn steps to the plate.

8:12 Rob Dibble just admitted to committing larceny* in the Minor Leagues.
A pop-up right in the middle of the infield. You think there was any chance Zim was letting Guzman catch it? Nope.
* I have no idea what the legal definition of larceny is, but he admitted to stealing steaks from grocery stores.

8:08 Debbie Taylor sighting #1. Her interview only took up 1 batter. I'm disappointed. She's usually good for at least 3 at bats.

8:05 Very close play at second, with Gooz getting called out trying to steal. Mental note: Get someone else to look up what the worst SB/CS ratio in history is. I bet the Nats are close to that number, whatever it is.

8:02 Det just hit a ball back to the pitcher in his first at bat. DCab has 31 plate appearances, and all his hit ball combined haven't gone as far.

7:59 Det through 3: 3 hits, 3 runs, 3 K, 3 errors behind him. It's crazy 3s! (Oh, and one hit batter, Nate McLouth. I hope his itty bitty elbow doesn't hurt. Actually, I do.)

7:57 Det just gave up a HR that had fucking eyeballs on it. It bounced off the top of the wall right where the wall drops 6 feet. Fuck.

7:52 Which of these two doesn't belong: Bill Madlock, batting champ or Freddie Sanchez, batting champ? How the hell did Freddie win a batting title?
Nick just botched a pick off throw. 3 errors in 2 1/3 innings. Poor Ross.

7:50 Is Delwyn Young part of the Delmon/Dmitri Young clan? He seems a lil' slim to be part of that family. Oh, and he just struck out. For the second time.

7:48 Josh Bard just hit a ball out of the infield. Don't go crazy folks, it was a lazy fly ball, but still... baby steps.

7:44 Crap. Bluetooth guy is now sporting a Nats jacket.

7:41 Yuengling #2. Two great innings from Detwiler (hereby known as Det since my fingers are hurting) and a groundball to Gooz that he didn't boot.

7:38 Some group of fans is cheering ala soccer. Do Pirate fans do that? Are there DC United fans here? Or... maybe the United is playing at RFK tonight, and the cheers from there can be heard over the crowd here?

7:36 Is that Michelle Obama at the park? Did I just pull a Matt Vasgersian?

7:28 The umpires blew a check swing call on Dunn. Wasn't even close. I was waiting for Dibble to say he didn't go around, but he said nothing.

7:24 Zim grounds into a DP w/no outs. He is tied for the league in that category. I feel a Dunn K coming up. Le sigh...

7:18 Two random guys are in the stands, one has sunglasses on, one has a blue tooth hanging from his ear. No baseball apparel. I think it's safe to say they're fans of the Mattoon Dbags.

7:14 Zim shows Gooze how it's done. Impressive first inning. Now feed that kid some hot dogs between innings. If someone told me he was more than 145 lbs, I'd call bullshit.

7:12 Guzman with his second error of the inning. Ross is screaming for his AA shortstop. Manny seems calm. Or dead. It's hard to tell with him, ain't it?

7:08 Guzman with an error. Hey, Ross, welcome to the bigs, where the defense is the same as AA!

7:07 The kid just pulled out a change-up for a strikeout. The Pirates have brothers in the starting lineup. Intriguing.

7:05 Ross is on the mound ready to go while the line-up cards are still being exchanged. Heh. 2 pitches, 2 strikes.

7:01 Dibble's transition lenses are semi-grey. I will update their shade as the game goes on.

6:57 BTW, do not expect this pace to continue. I will prolly only have updates every 15 mins or so. (For the -5 of you folks watching). Ben Goeessselling says we can expect to see Bergmann up soon. Yes. FREE THE BERGMANN!

6:54 The guy with the glasses has his anti-Mets MASN commercial on. I saw him outside the bathroom at yesterday's game and wanted to punch him in his face, smashing his glasses into his eyeballs. I have no clue why.

6:53 Ross is wearing #48. Buy your jerseys today, folks. Ohlendorferer is #49.

6:52 Yuengling #1. There might be 750 people in the stadium. Maybe they're all getting food and drink? Either that, or they're watching the pregame show live from centerfield to see Ray's magnificent mane blowing in the stiff breeze.

6:50 Watching the pregame show on MASN. Just saw Ray Knight playing a baserunner for a defensive display segment with Nick Johnson. Ray's gotta be pushing 250. He makes Nick look svelte.


Rebecca said...

I guess this is cool? But it's kind of annoying for me watching the game with you. You know your times are a bit off given the DVR pauses?

Rebecca said...

Can we turn the game off now that Mock walked that pirate with the first 4 pitches he threw? We can pretend it is over. I have resorted to this as my form of communication during your live blog.

Phishisgr8 said...

Sure thing, babe. Can you get me a beer wile you're up?

Rebecca said...

Don't mind the fire, sweetie. It's just the baseball Colome threw up to you at the game yesterday.

Rebecca said...

I'm burning it because he sucks.

Rebecca said...

BTW - that lady doesn't look anything like Michelle Obabma. It's like while I was in Peace Corps in Kenya and a Dutch man came to 'open a new building' at our school that his charity paid for and all my students siad, "Mwalimu, that is your father" and i was all, "yeah, 'cause all of us white guys look alike.'

Puttzy said...

I think its awesome that Oktoberfest tickets went on sale the same day this series started!

'rats 1-0