Sorry for not writing about opening day sooner, but I had a huge hangover. You see, I imbibed way too much HARPER-STRAS-ZIMMY AWESOME SAUCE. (Yeah!) Seriously, that was an awesome day, and anything I write certainly won't do the experience justice. Suffice to say, there were some incredible things at the park, including the awesome straight-from-getting-hitched-appearance by @TClippardsSpecs and @StephaNats (awesome job, you two, even if you are stuck for life with DOUG F*CKING SLATEN references, Stephanie) to getting my kid her first slushie (it was "red flavor," and she loved it).
After I got home, I took a long nap, cause seeing good baseball is exhausting, then popped the game on the TV. What follows is my lazy excuse for a post. GIFS. LOTS OF GIFS. Enjoy?
After Bryce's first
Ruthian Harperian blast, I took a look at the warm dugout reception. It's not clear, but I'm 99.9% positive we have Desi popping lids again.
Oh, who's this gentleman that comes over to get in Bryce's ear? Chad Tracy. I wonder what he said? (Also, look at McCatty on the bench behind Harper. He looks deliriously lost...
We also find out that Harp and Bernie have some kind of hybrid "Tongue-Out-Claw-Elbow-Drop." I bet they're the reigning tag-team champions in the Nats Clubhouse Wrestling Federation.
Oh, hello there, Mr. Tracy, as you saunter into Bryce's ear once again. Bryce utters three magic words, and with with a quick nod and nudge, you grant your permission to the youngster. I didn't realize you were the Don of the club, but let me know when your daughter's wedding date is. I have a request or two to make about my restraining orders on certain professional baseball players being removed. (Also, McCatty still looks like he has no idea what's going on.)
And finally, what had to be my Super Number One Awesome Occurrence that I saw while watching the game.
You have no idea how many times I watched, rewound, watched, rewound and watched this again. It had to be in the hundreds. These two had to have practiced this, right? Perfect mirror images of each other. And they both do the exact same thing with their mouth when they're done gulping. The only thing that could have made this any better is if they wore matching attire, but that's nit-picking. And no one likes a nit-picker. (Unless your name is Nit, and you're playing pickup sandlot baseball, then you like Nit-pickers. No one enjoys being the Ike Davis of their league, ya know.)