Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Shocking pictures of Drew Storen with long pants revealed! Flood watch from tears expected.

You know what? I'm just gonna rename the blog "Storen Nation (as viewed from Twitter and beyond)."

Why? Well, maybe it has something to do with the fact that six of the last 21 posts of mine have been devoted to Drew. Or, more-so, devoted to Drew's socks.

And... I continue that trend with a new Drew Storen SOCKS of DOOM! post. It is with a heavy heart, and millions of tears flowing down my cheeks, that I post this picture*. It's like when Brad and Jennifer broke up all over again. (sob.)

Who is that guy with the wicked leg kick, but awful pants? Wait for it...

GAH!!!!!!!!!!!! My God, Drew! Think of your fans. Like this little guy here...

At last check, the vote was 45 people for the SOCKS of DOOM!, and only two against. You know why? Because cool mother fuckers rock the socks, that's why. Like... well, The Non-Human.

That stud Lou Gehrig

And some dude named Cy fricking Young.

You know why only two people have voted to lose the socks? Because they're EVIL, that's why. Look at all these evil people that wear pants. Like... The DEVIL!!!

Saddam Hussein (when he can find them).

And the worst of all.... Chase ASS HAT! Utley (Ugh. I get a chill down my spine anytime someone even mentions his name. Seriously. Just look at that smug shit below. You know he drowns kittens and puppies when he's not busy breaking catcher's legs. Nice fake dirt stains, Chase.)

Seriously, Drew. Don't make me actually have to drive to Harrisburg to... well, to beg and plead while on my knees crying. My wife thinks I'm all grown up, and that would set me back a few years in her eyes.

(*Pants pictures complements of the always awesomely awesome Pam Storen. You can read the article yourself here (starts on page 23). It's actually a good story. Except for, you know, the whole no socks thing.)


The Doctor said...

It's starting to border on obsession, possibly of the unhealthy type.

Section 138 said...

I 100% agree, and I'm terrified.

Rebecca said...

That leg kick is awesome. Can you tell us/remind us about the players who have been brought up in the past few weeks ... Mike Morse, Pete Orr, Justin Maxwell, Jorge Padilla?

Because I'm too lazy to research that myself. And you seem to need a distraction...