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Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Tony Plush pimps, and Ryan Braun irritates.

Nyjer Morgan (aka Tony Plush) is proving to be an invaluable lead-off man, and an invaluable glove. In his last two games, Nyjer is 5 for 10 with a lead-off HR, 4 RBI, and a stolen base. His range in the outfield cannot be defined by our puny human number system, and can only be described as "great googly moogly" good. When he was asked about his lead-off home run last night, Mr. Plush laid it down for us.
The last couple of days, the pitchers have started me off inside, so I had an idea they were going to pound me in," Morgan said. "It's just one of those things where I was feeling a little sexy at the dish.
Sexy indeed, Tony. Sexy indeed.


Ryan Braun, on the other hand, is proving to be a nuisance. He's gone 5-8 with 3 RBI, scored 4 R, and has hit a 2B, 3B, and 2 HR. I'm telling you, I'll be so happy when we leave Milwaukee and no longer have to see this guy:


Oh, wait. Wong picture. Sorry about that. Here's the guy I won't miss a bit:



Easy enough mistake to make, no?

The Nationals have won four sweet-ass games in a row, and others in the league (and some fans that want Bryce Harper on the team) are screaming, "Break up the Nats!" In the four wins, the offense has scored 38 runs while the pitching has allowed only 12 runs. That right there, my friends, is how you win ballgames.

The trade deadline is just about 60 hours away, and our dreamy reliever from Stanford keeps on keeping on, but work is calling. I'll have to leave that post to another time. I'll leave you with one more thought, though... This one focusing on tonight's game.

Manny Parra is on the bump, and he's bringing his 6.42 ERA with him. That dude doesn't stand a chance.

4 comments:

Joseph Alexander said...

I am feeling dangersouly giddy about how they're doing.

That being said, one of my co-workers made the excellent observation that the Nats only start to win whenever I'm out of the office. The last real winning streak they had? I was in New Jersey and Northern Ireland...

So my suggestion is that the Nats should just pay my salary for me to sit at home and not work. That way, they win and I can be lazy - it's a win-win for everybody!

ps. I'm back at work as of today...

Joseph Alexander said...

and yes, I have the spelling skills of a two-year-old.

In fact, I think my two-year-old nephew can in fact spell better than me.

Anonymous said...

reader request: can you insert this feedburner deal where people type in their email address and the post comes to them in their inbox, please, mister.

Section 138 said...

Dear Mr. or Mrs. Anon,

I did my best, but I felt about as comfortable as a whore in church setting that feedburner thingie up. All I know is that there's now a 'subscribe via email' link on the top right o' the blog.
It appears that emails only get sent once a day, however. If you know anything else about Feedburner that contradicts that once a day sending rule, well then... screw you. After you feel bad, however, please let me know how to change it!
KTHXBAI!