The Nationals will destroy your team

Nationals cruised to a 6-3 victory last night. Mega awesome game. Back to back taters by ZIM! and Slick off that Tim Galvine guy. I was right in yesterdays post when I said I don't think he'll be any good. Although, when you think about it, those two could go yard off Moses and Stalin (who had a really sharp 12-6 curve).
Sweet Jesus, Zim can rake. If you see the highlights on TV, pause his double when it hits the wall, and you can see me. Seriously. Anyway, that fucker hit that double on a rope. Kearnsie and Blastings decided to hit doubles as well. Slick went back to the socks, and they showed they are magically magical. I'll wager we see him wearing them today, as well.
Super duper job to Capt. Redd, Saulie, mi hermano, and Rauchie. Those dudes were throwing last night. Those injins were so sad it was like the trail of tears all over again.

Things I can confirm:
a)Hammer hands did give Wil the Thril his game winning home run ball (I asked).
b)Cardiac's arm fell off (I saw).

Things I cannot confirm:
a)Hammer hands tried to give it to him in the locker room, but when he tossed it to him, it went backwards 315 feet.
b)He will be effective at some point in the future.

Finally, I am convinced the Nats have a street gang, and a gang sign. Saul Rivera threw it at me last night, and Wil the Thril gave half of one. I have now been marked for death by 2 Puerto Rican's and 1 Mexican. When Colome follows suit, I will drop dead within 24 hours.